He seemed perfect. Spiritual, successful, handsome, fun, and dynamic. We hadn’t been dating long, but when I told him I would be traveling to Brazil for a month he said he would do whatever it took to make this relationship work. I agreed.
We facetimed everyday. On Valentine's Day, I had my dad trudge through a blistering cold winter day to drop off white roses & chocolate at his lobby. I returned to NYC in March and we celebrated my birthday. I was falling in love.
One week later, he sits me down and the prince charming I thought I knew died before my very eyes. He confessed to sleeping with a girl he met at Whole Foods recently, and she was now pregnant. He said, “she's a model & I feel her status is something important to explore.” I was devastated, and we broke up.
5 months later he crawled back to me, saying he realized that “beauty lives more within than it does on the outside.” Still blinded by “love”, I allowed him into my life yet again. 6 more painful months went by before we broke up for the second time, and today I can say it's finally over.
I've realized that you can never change a leopard's spots. A man who disrespects a woman once will continue to do so. If it's not through infidelity, it's through coercion, verbal/emotional abuse, or manipulation.
I am happy to say I am now stronger, better, and smarter for having gone through this. I am proud I have a big heart that can forgive - even prouder to have one that can move on without any hatred. I embody peace, restfulness, awareness, readiness. I know I will find someone worthy of that; a good, honest, true, authentic, deep, loving person.